Delivery in Hand? Hand Delivery.

Good New’s, people:

COMPANY’S PAN CARD?

FIN

Check out the chix!

At this time last year, Ronald and I went to a popular restaurant at Sanpada, near Vashi in New Bombay, India to drink bottles of buttermilk. And opposite, is a downtrodden ‘movie hall’ that plays old and down market moves. A cheap ticket grants you access to the ‘sperm bank’; I suspect the audiences jerk off inside! The photo above shows the ‘ticket counter’ and the guy selling tickets. Some clients too.

chaos on the streets of Bihar

Almost everybody who drove a motor vehicle in Patna that day must be sentenced to death. Or at least honking must be banned. Clear road or not, these magots just went on pounding the damn horn. And pounding it.

“Don’t use the fucking horn you bloody piece of shit!”

Alcohol prices in Alibaug

I found this, the only bar close to the bus station at Alibaug. A good four minutes walk from it, in fact. And one other close to the bypass, some ten minutes away, by foot. It is interesting to compare liquor prices with Mumbai.

“Slumdog Millionaire” in real life

“I have come from Uttar Pradesh. I came here in 1997, ticketless, by train. Some people from my village were here before me. They’d made friends with the local slumlord and acquired a portion of this pavement, for business.”

Sachinder and his friends run a juice centre on a pavement at New Bombay. Flies, mosquitoes galore! He lives in a 10 feet x 10 feet pigeon-hole like space, that he shares with thirteen others, bachelors, like himself, from Uttar Pradesh, at New Bombay.

The State of Black and White Photography in Bombay, India

Paritosh and his brother are poor. But they have a skill, one skill. Paritosh and his brother are darkroom experts. Black and White. Processing and prints. Paritosh and his brother as as good as the best photo labs in the city. Times before digital photography. Paritosh and his brother’d rent a one room apartment at Prabhadevi, a relatively expensive neighborhood in Bombay that’d serve as their darkroom. Digital photography’d be a thing of the future. Black and white photography’d be a niche but popular art. Paritosh and his brother are simple and honest, very likable gentlemen. Client’s love them, and, their work, that compares to the best in the city.

In came digital photography. Paritosh and his brother’s business suffered a setback. Clients had taken to the digital scheme of things. Media, print and online switched to the digital scheme of things, for obvious reasons. In the months to come, Paritosh and his brother’s business suffered further setbacks. Paritosh and his brother have no other skill, remember. No capital to invest in a digital lab. Paritosh and his brother left their apartment in Prabhadevi and moved their darkroom to a slum, in Mahim. Loyal clients continued to patronise them, at the slum, at Mahim, but the numbers reduced, at a steady pace.

Beer and the City

And this is as recent as 1998. A 650 ml bottle of beer’d cost 55 rupees. 2.50 rupees for a cigarette. It’d then be 3. Soon, 4. Now, 4.50. All due to government taxes. Bloody government.

London Pilsner and Haywards were the only others, Kingfisher being the preferred beer. San Miguel and Hack Beck (not sure if that’s how it is spelt quickly appeared, but disappeared. Just like that. I don’t recall the taste.

I remember the day, Fosters launched. But we never took to it. Kingfisher still rocked. Its cost, still, 55 rupees. Soon it’d be 60. One fine day, 75. 80. Now, a KF costs 105. But we have choices. Budweiser sucks. Carlsberg and Tuborg rock. But that doesn’t mean they charge us 105 rupees. In fact, they charge 130 rupees for Carlsberg at some bars.

Bloody government.

Cobra came and went, Tiger is available, at some bars, I think. I haven’t given Cobra a decent go, but Tiger sucks, if I remember right. I’d had it once, I think. Yes.

I am a beer drinking citizen of this country. I kindly request honorable MLA, kind sir, bloody chewteaya, please raise my issue in the house of parliament. Screw sessions on development, farmers, terrorism etc. Instead, fight for the rights of a beer drinker. I must be issued a pass. Just like the government’d announced, only a few days ago, rice for the poor at three rupees a kilo, I must get, a liter of beer, at three rupees.

But today’s news papers say that the cost of beer, digital cameras and some other shit’ll rise, in a day, or two.

Bloody government.

FIN

Amores perros

If you haven’t, yet watched, Amores perros (Love’s a bitch, in English), you shouldn’t read this, yet. Having said that, let me warn you, this movie, could be very disturbing, especially, if you love dogs, and can’t watch’em tortured, bleed and die. OKAY. And YA, there ain’t enough sex in it.

“Don’t give truck drivers any more free condoms!”

“The government is planning to not give truck drivers any more free condoms!”

“Why?”

“Because, they’re using their condoms to fix flat tyres!”

“What?”

“YA they’re keeping their condoms, not using it during sex, and instead, they’re using it to fix punctured tires, they’re gluing it to the tubes of their  ruptured tyres!”

Tortoise meat for breakfast, and lunch, and dinner.

“Bugger, bugger, I went to my village, and this villager cooked tortoise.”

“Are they not endangered? On the verge of extinction or something? Is it not illegal to kill tortoise?”