The funniest quotes, tweets and signs from 2011

“There are two Heath Streaks.”

Television commentary during the Cricket World Cup. Or at least I thought I heard it. It sounded extremely funny under the influence (of).

“We need your spare balloon.”

Ross on Holi.

#supermoon Now we’re all fucked.

A tweet by an Anonymous user who’s clearly had enough of this talk about the Super Mood being the cause of tsunamis and a sign that the world coming to an end.


its scary cos he shows u a game and he says “well i played before then,” and it is a game from 1970!!

Found on an online forum discussing cricket commentators. And this one’s about Richie Benaud. The youth these days! Bloody lunatics!


“So now does he have new knees or someone else’s knees?”

An unidentified person enquiring about a knee replacement procedure.

“Sheets are always white, you’re excellency.”

The weirdest things known to have been said in bed. #1

“His pants are dirty!”

Agnes isn’t impressed by the fact that Brett Lee’s pants were dirty during the World Cup 2011 quarter-finals against India.

“A pillow really changes your perspective in life.”

The weirdest things known to have been said in bed. #2

“Ummmm… don’t use teeth!”

The weirdest things known to have been said in bed. #3

“I tried phone-sex once, but the holes in the dialer were too small.”

Read on twitter

“In this world, we’re nobody’s brother and nobody’s sister and nobody’s father and nobody’s mother. We were born to fuck each other.”

My response to Seamus when he asked me what I thought of the concept of brocode. A friend of his won’t make a move on another friend’s sister. brocode, apparently something mentioned in the TV shop How I Met Your Mother has inspired his decision. I wonder why young Indian boys sit and watch such shit.

I then got bored and stopped updating this.

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