27 October, 2008. 3:27 P.M. IST
Duncan and Geoffery chat over the Internet, Google Talk. Duncan’s in Persia, Geoffery in Bombay, India:
17 December 2008, 8:27 P.M. IST
Duncan and Geoffery further commit to the task at hand:
Friday, 26 December, 1:00 P.M. IST
“Bugger, where are we going tomorrow?”
“I don’t know. Let’s just take the car and take off! We can go to that fort and come back. Or probably stay at Khandala!”
“Bugger, Khandala sucks! Let me speak to Benjaman.”
“Bugger, Benjaman, where are we going tomorrow?”
“Bugger, check that book of yours and suggest a place. I’m busy at work. It’ll be excellent if you can send us some website links.”
So Geoffery opens his guide book, the very first page reads: Kalote Lake, location, Karjat-Khopoli, by road, 73 kms along the old Mumbai-Pune highway. Lake! Let’s go! After a few Googles, Geoffery pastes some web links on Benjaman and Duncan’s chat windows!
“Bugger! Let’s go!”
Saturday, 27 December 2008, 6:00 A.M. IST
Duncan, Geoffery, Benjaman and Gus assemble at the top of the road.
“Fuck! I cannot believe we’ve actually made it! We’re doing a road trip! Let’s go!”
Duncan logs on to his satellite global positioning software via his mobile phone. The boys drive towards Vashi, New Bombay but a few kilometers before toll:
“Oh fuck! My wallet! I didn’t bring my wallet! It must have fallen off somewhere here! Oh fuck! No! I don’t have my wallet! HA HA HA HA! Benjaman has done it again!”
So the boys head back to the top of the road to fetch Benjaman’s wallet. But within minutes they’re back on the highway.
“OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Sunrise! Lush!”
They pass by trucks, cars, reckless bikes along the old Pune road, drive along until they reach Uncle’s shop, Uncle, their good luck charm at Khopoli junction. The boys craved for balls of potato squashed within loafs of bread. But it was not to be. Instead they were served chickpea scattered among farsan and sewage water.. a local delight, Usal Pav:
Photo by Duncan
As the boys were leaving, the cook was to deep frying his potatoes. Duration 11 seconds:
After breakfast and tea:
“Let’s ask him how to get to the lake!”
“बॉस, कलोते लेक कैसा जानेका?”
“इधर से लेफ्ट जाओ। पली रोड पे। उधर फाटक आयगा। उधर पूछो।”
“The same Pali Road! The same road we took to Durshet! Let’s go!”
“Bugger, let’s be sure! Let’s doubly check with this bar guy!”
“बॉस, कलोते लेक जानेका है।”
“सीधा जाओ। बॉम्बे रोड पे। ७ किलोमीटर। “
“इधर और क्या है?”
“हिल स्टेशन। पली रोड पे। रिसॉर्ट है।”
“He’s saying that we’ve overshot! We got to backtrack towards Bombay for about seven kilometers! But there is a hill station and resort down Pali Road.”
“Are you sure?”
“Lets do a right here, go towards the rickshaw stand and ask the rickshaw drivers!”
“YA! Good idea!”
“कलोते लेक?”
“सीधा बॉम्बे रोड पे। ग़ज़ल होटल है। होटल बंद है। लेकिन उधर से राइट लो.. काचा रास्ता। कलोते।”
“YA, bugger, we got to go down towards Bombay for about seven kilometers and do a right at Ghazal Hotel, its a rundown place. There on, its two kilometers down an underdeveloped road!”
“Oh fuck! काचा रास्ता!”
The boys backtrack for a few minutes until Gus exclaims:
“Ghazal Hotel! Ghazal Hotel! It went back! I saw it! That’s Ghazal Hotel!”
“Benjaman, you’ll surely find a U turn up ahead!”
“There it is!”
The boys drive down bumpy underdeveloped roads, one kilometer, then two, maybe a little more until they find civilization. A house, then a resort, Eden Park. No accommodation at any of these places but Tudor Retreat next door welcomes them:
“Do you’ll have rooms?”
“Yes, we do! Do you’ll want to stay overnight?”
“Yes, we were thinking of staying! Four of us. We couldn’t find you’ll on the Internet. How much are the rooms?”
“Fifteen hundred rupees per head. That includes breakfast now, lunch, evening tea, dinner and breakfast tomorrow morning. We have beer. One hundred and forty per bottle. You can even get your own alcohol. I don’t mind you’ll drinking anything. Yes, I do not advertise. I go word of mouth. This is my house. I want to have the right to say NO to anyone. Please make yourselves comfortable. We’ll show you rooms. We have several bungalows on our property. We even rent out our place for film shoots. We’ll show you, but before that, please introduce yourselves!”
“I’m Benjaman, I work for a company that makes banking software!”
“Oh how nice! All technical!”
“I’m Geoffery, I’m a photographer and I make documentary films.”
“Oh how interesting! You must see our place! Tell me if its film worthy!”
“I’m Gus, I’m doing my MBA.”
“I’m Duncan, I work in telecom.”
“Nice, good group. Welcome! He’ll take you through our rooms.”
“Thank you!”
The boys glance through what they have to offer. They’re impressed, settle on a bungalow at the edge of the property.
“Bugger, bugger, there’s no water! The flush doesn’t work! And I peed in the pot!”
“Bugger! Bugger! No! Flush it!”
Several minutes later, the water supply was in place. But the flush refused to work. Geoffery poured a bucket of water down the pot where he had peed. A bugger or two relieved themselves thereafter. Following these events, the boys had breakfast and split a beer up a tree house at the edge of the lake. Thereafter, they did a hike up one of the surrounding hills and returned to the edge of the lake:
A view of the lake atop the hill. Photo by Duncan.
Benjaman, Duncan and Gus took to the bottle. Geoffery put on a life vest and jumped into the pool. Half hour or so later, he joined the others, corked open a bottle of beer:
“Bugger, there is something wrong with this beer!”
“Here, Gus, taste it!”
“Eeks! It tastes like piss!”
“Let’s go tell Mrs. K!”
“Mrs. K, there is something wrong with this beer! There are particles floating in this!”
“Okay, empty it in this bowl!”
“Eeks! Dead ants! Fifty of them! Inside a bottle of Fosters! How come?”
“I’ll tell you anything can happen in this country! I bought this beer all the way from Belapur!”
The boys were shellshocked by her reply. She expressed no emotions despite seeing ants pour out of a bottle of beer, over and above, she tells them that the beer had been bought from Belapur, the scum of New Bombay. The beer was replaced. It is also worth mentioning that none of the beers served were chilled. Nevertheless:
“Bugger! See that island! Lets have lunch and swim to that island!”
“Yes!”
Lunch at Tudor Retreat wasn’t the best. But nothing to complain about. After lunch, all Geoffery could think about was that island. The swim. Some brief digestion yoga exercises and he was in the lake again, waiting for his friends. But they didn’t show up. Fifteen minutes, twenty, no sign of them. Geoffery simply had to conquer the island. An hour, maybe more, he was at the island. He swam against the current. He reached. He conquered. Fifteen minutes or so of enjoying the moment, he spotted Duncan and Gus at the jetty:
“Bugger! Lush! Hang on! We’re coming!”
“Come bugger! Come!”
A satellite image of Kalote Lake indicating Geoffery’s starting and finish points.
Duncan and Gus began their quest for the island. But the the sun would set in a few minutes. Geoffery decided to swim back. Three hundred meters or so from the jetty, he suffered severe cramps in the left thigh. Gus helped him stretch his leg. In pain, he reached back, shivering. The water was cold. The air, even cooler. The combination further aggravated his sore throat and headache. Sick, he made the ten minute walk back to the room and had a shower. Some bread with butter helped. But by now his head was splitting in pain. The condition of his throat further worsened. An early dinner and he was off to sleep. The rest of the boys returned to the room a few minutes later. A good nights sleep. In the morning, the waiter needed several minutes and reminders before he could serve the boys eggs. Nourished, they zoomed and reached New Bombay in no time. At lunch they realised that each of them has a cousin by the name of Michelle.
Duncan showed us the route that he had plotted using his GPS phone. Well done Duncan:
A small video shot during the trip by Geoffery. Duration 56 seconds:
SUMMARY of Kalote Lake/Tudor Retreat
LOCATION 6/10
LAKE 10/10
FOOD 6/10
MANAGEMENT 0/10
SERVICE -10/10 (negative ten)
TIP carry your own alcohol. carry your own meat, coal and barbecue.
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Hey shaaaks sounds like a wonderful and adventurous trip… i think i’ll consider doing kalote lake but i wonder if the girls will agree to it….